Saying Goodbye To A Pet Is Never Easy

Posted on October 2, 2011 by Rita Brennan Freay

my first baby

I lost my first baby, bandana boy, sooo sad.  The decision was hard.  And even though it may have been obvious, the loss of a pet is never easy.  I still remember the day I had to go back to NY to send my childhood dog to doggie heaven…..I was so traumatized by it all, I swore I would never get another dog.  Umm, I lied.  But, who could resist this adorable puppy (he is the one in the middle, and that is his mom and brother, german short haired pointers!)

I love puppies!

However,  that experience prepared me for this.  Helped me help my kids.  I made sure they each got to say goodbye and tell him they loved him.  As much as I tried to explain it, the young ones didn’t really get it all.  But they know he is NOT coming home.  They asked me “how is he going to get to heaven, can I go with him, and can we get a new dog?”  All of which sent my oldest into hysterics…because she gets it and was begging  “please don’t do “it” mommy”.  Eventually, thru the tears, she saw how difficult it was for (me and) the dog and as we had his “send off party” she started to come to terms with the fact that it was happening….now:(

The Animal Hospital was amazing on short notice!  He’s gone there since he was a puppy.  However, that doesn’t mean he always liked it…and as a matter of fact he hated it sometimes.  SO, I was relieved they worked it out so we could drive there with the dog on his bed in the back of the truck and they would come out and do it all right there!  No moving, carrying, NO traumatizing my dog.  Had no idea that was an option.  Things have really changed!  THANK you Dr. Smith!  It went SO much better than expected, I was a mess, but the dog was calm and at peace….which is ALL that mattered.

We’re lucky to have so many great years and memories with him.  I remember telling my mother I wish he could wear diapers, it would be so much easier, lol!  Obedience/social training with Capital Canines was a hoot, BUT he finally graduated, which is good beacuse he loved going to the dog park when he was younger…look ma, no fighting!  He dressed and enjoyed our annual Halloween parties and was a HUGE part of my life and our family for 16 years…a GREAT dog, protector, good listener, a friend, and was overflowing with unconditional love….always knowing just when you needed him.

It is so quiet, an eeryfeeling, I don’t like it.  I keep looking for him…omg, the loss of a pet is hard, takes time, and really hurts, no matter how many times you go thru it!

Bandana Boy

Love you buddy,

Mommy

Do you have a pet?  Lose a pet?  How do you say goodbye?  How can you prepare?  What is your favorite memory?  Favorite picture?  Any advice on preserving the memory (for young kids)?

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Foster Care, Adoption and Giving Back

Posted on September 12, 2011 by Rita Brennan Freay

Who needs a hand?

Giving back is a part of life, and big on the list.  Not something I was necessarily “taught” as a child, but something that came over time, at home, in college, and when I entered the “real” world.  Who knew that Foster Care, Adoption, and giving back would soon become a large part of my life.

In college I joined Alpha Phi Omega, a National Co-Ed Service Fraternity, and learned what it meant to give back as a group as well as individually.  It was a great way to meet people and also feel good about what you were doing.  Yes, we had our fair share of parties and fun, but “being in service” was the goal. 

Into to a job, and a boss who I learned so much from, beginning with giving back.  I am not sure he realizes what an impact he had on me in that regard but he did.  Here was this highly paid, VIP, who people were in awe of, yet so down to earth and giving of his time, money, and love….to his church, community, his family, his co-workers, and anyone who needed it.  He also adopted internationally and has always been an inspiration to me.

Fast forward, to married with kids, and already involved in my church and my community.  When the opportunity to Foster came to light, it was an easy decision.  We could help one family, one child, and make a difference in their lives.  It was about giving back.  It is much easier to do than most people think, and it doesn’t have to be long term….you can make a lasting impact on the system and a child, in small ways like emergency care, respite, or having a fund raiser!

Today I saw a tweet about a touching story…two boys who are Seniors in HS in New Jersey, adopted as babies, who met and found out about eachother at a chance meeting  while they were in 8th grade.  The bond was formed.  And, together they’ve decided to give back to foster kids in a fun way!  All while creating awareness and raising money for the Dave Thomas Foundation.  It’s a wonderful story, one of many I hope my kids will learn about and take to heart….as I teach them about foster care, adoption, and giving back to their community.

I commented on a YouTube video the boys posted featuring their story, and hope you will too.  I let them know I thought they were doing GREAT things!  Hopefully inspiring and encouraging them to continue the journey of making a difference and giving back…..for ALL the kids!

Small things make a big difference….you have the power to change a life!

Rita

What are your thoughts about giving back?  Did you learn from your parents?  How do you ”give back” or pay it forward?  What have you taught your kids about this or is it something that just happens?  Do you know of any other foster kids giving back?  I would love to encourage and cheer them on!

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Fantasy Football is not my thing……Do you play?

Posted on September 6, 2011 by Rita Brennan Freay

Touchdown!

Football season is almost here!  The first Sunday night game will be the New York Jets against the Dallas Cowboys, in NY, brother against brother, twins, woo hoo!  Rex is feeling tremendous pressure to win this for NY, Septemeber 11 anniversary and all.  I hope he does!  But, I’d say no pressure, just have fun!  That’s because I don’t take it seriously enough so I am told, lol!  And the reason….because I  don’t play fantasy football…gag me, its just not my thing! 

My husband does, and wins, does that count?!  Me, I like the real deal.  Doesn’t mean I am not a fan, don’t like the game, or the parties, lol!  It doesn’t stop me from watching and rooting for our teams (yes, I say teams because we have a divided house and I have to play nice for the kids)….Go Jets and sometimes Go Redskins, hehehe!  BUT, I prefer GREEN…the color of money, that’s what I tell my kids!  

Writing this for my sister who will gag if she read this, as she is a BLUE fan…..and says Go Giants!  Doesn’t matter, its all fun and games….and we get to tease each other a bit…..well sometimes more than we’d like depending on how badly your team is in any given season.  Enough said.  BUT then again they are both NY teams….so I guess I shoudn’t complain.

I love that my kids are getting into sports, watching more, and are excited to take part in cheering the teams on….the young ones have NO idea who these teams are or where they are from…so its all good for them and the rest of us!  So for now, I will stick to watching on tv, fighting with my sister, and leave the fantasy football sites to my husband. 

Are you ready for some football?!??!

Rita

What’s your favorite team?  Favorite player?  Season tickets?  Gameday rituals?  Any good ideas on how to tease my sister, lol!

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Kindergarten snack ideas were the last thing on my mind!

Posted on August 29, 2011 by Rita Brennan Freay

First day of school!

Yay, we’re back to school today!  Hurricane Irene wasn’t going to stop us!  It is a milestone, one I have to admit I wasn’t sure we’d make with all that has gone on.  All my kids cared about were the snacks, and the backpacks!  I have to say, kindergarten snack ideas were the LAST thing on my mind!  Can you say stress?  We made it!  Thru an earthquake, a hurricane, and now the first day of school!  We’re here…..we’ve arrived.  Yay!

It was an early start, busy time, and an emotional rollercoaster for everybody.  One was excited, one was staying home, one had a sick stomach, and the last only cared about the snacks! lol!  Needless to say, somehow we made it out the door, to school, supplies in hand….and we were on time!  Got to take our annual picture at the school sign, along with the rest of the 400 kids, eeeek!

Dropping off at middle school was thankfully less eventful than I thought, considering the drama that led up to it.  I am so proud of her!!!  Heading over to Kindergarten with 3 little ones, people pointing, smiling, and saying I was thinking about you this morning….”how did you get 4 kids out the door on time?” made me laugh….if they only knew the drama, lol! 

As I entered the building I saw a few friends and welcoming faces, they hugged me and I started to lose it.  Crap I was beginning to crumble.  We can’t have that!  I was doing so well keeping it all together, maintaining composure, and keeping strong for the kids, that’s what moms do, right?!  That is how I have lived my life!  So, I had to push on, keep moving, telling the kids to go, go, go…..let’s find your classroom with all the toys and the palm tree!  And so we went.

Then came Aunt Bert….someone who has been there since the beginning, someone who knows me, knows the story, knows my kids, and knows just how much this day means to me.  She started welling up, tears coming, and I could barely keep it together….BUT we had to push on.  Kindgergarten was waiting for us.  We got to the class, and as Aunt Bert said, this is a big day….this is a great day.  Knowing she is right, I smiled, and said we have been waiting for this day, for a very long time!  I am so grateful we are here, and we made it! 

Most of you may not know my whole story, but you know that I have a special place in my heart for adoptive and foster kids….and today it really hit home for me.  This is what is as all  about.  Makes  me want to  do so much more for them.  Thinking about how many of them are starting school off, without a loving family to support them.  Seeing all the parents with the kids, the cameras, the hugs, the crying, the LOVE.  It is all the kids want….to be loved and cared for….and today we were doing that.  

On pick up from school, they told me all about snack, who ate what, what containers there were, it was all about food.  Its funny, in preschool they didn’t have choices and so we never talked about it.  But now, they wanted to tell me about snack ideas for tomorrow, lol!  Carrots, peanut butter, popcorn, grapes, the list went on and on!  I didn’t care about snack, I wanted to know how it all went!!!  But they had other ideas, showing me their sparkly I survived metals/neckalces.  Very cute….now get to the important stuff, lol!  Did you have a good  day?  I got different answers…..and the one I liked the best was “today was incredible.”  All I could was smile and think….it doesn’t get much better than this!  Really!  Life is good…especially in Kindergarten!  We’re going to complete our First day of  Kindergarten activities….and have fun!  

Gratefully, we had our first day of school moms coffee, so I met some friends at Panera after drop  off and the biggest question they (and the school staff) had is what are you going to do with all your free time?  Honestly, I am not entirely sure, but I am looking forward to some ME time, and going to the potty by myself, lol!

Enjoy the time with kids and loved ones, it goes by so fast……hoping your back to school is as great as mine…..even though there were mixed feelings and plenty to tears for me (ALL mine!). 

Going to go and make a list of kindergarten snack ideas and start packing for tomorrow….fingers crossed that day 2 goes as smoothly!!!

Rita 

How was your first day of school?  Was it an emotional day?  Do your kids have snack, is it still a big deal?  Any fun ideas on what to send for snack?

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Earthquake safety and hurricane preparations, WHO pissed off Mother Nature?

Posted on August 23, 2011 by Rita Brennan Freay

Did I feel the earth move…under my feet?!  Wait, was that an Earthquake?  Holy crap, yes, it was!  Seroiusly, and sadly, I wasn’t sure….and neither were any of my neighbors!  When you live in earthquake zones you expect earthquakes.  When you live in the DC metroploitan area you worry it might be something else!  So, in a weird strange way are happy it was  an earthquake!  The concensus on my street is we all feel lucky and are relieved it was just an act of mother nature, moving the earth!  All be it, 5.9 earthquake, the biggest in this area in a very long time, a significant event.  Sadly, I know little about earthequake safety or hurricane preparations!

I was with my kids, going in and out of the house, on my laptop trying to write a blog with my daughter, and had a few kids on the trampoline, one on the swingset, one running into the house…..when the deck started moving, the table shaking, windows rattling, swaying, clearly a scary feeling knowing you are out of control.  My daughter saying what is that?  Having to say I don’t know as its getting worse and worse, then the sound of your house moving, the look in your kids eyes, things you never forget!  It sent my daughter screaming inside looking for daddy working in the basement (not a good idea) as I was trying to gather the rest of the kids…with a firm voice!  He eventually appeared wondering and saying “what the hell was that?”, he said stuff is moving, shaking, falling off the shelves, and he wanted to know if we felt it.  Haha, did you not hear the screams or see our faces?!

Thank god for my neighbors…Donna (who survived a 7.2 quake in LA) yelled over STAY outside, bringing my oldest back out, and stopping me from sending the others inside.  My college buddy lives across the street, being home alone, he came outside to see if “it was just my house moving” and he heard me telling the kids to “get together and stay with me!” as we swayed back and forth.  It was nice to have him and Donna there…..thanks guys! 

We had no land lines, no cell phones, no texting….but the weird thing is we could receive them!  As we waited for tv confirmation that it was an earthquake I immediately thought about my college friends visiting that we had dinner with last night who were in DC sight seeing with their kids!  Just hoping they were alright.  I had people calling, texting, and asking if we were OK?  But, I couldn’t answer, although I did try, lol!  Oddly enough, I did have access to Facebook!  Woot!  Watched people up and down the east coast posting how they felt the quake, so I knew we weren’t alone, which was good to know and a comforting feeling….and as I’ve learned from Seth Godins post today, its normal to want to feel that way!  It was great that from my cell I was able to tell people we are all ok, things are fine, shaken up a bit, literally, but grateful all is Okay!

Needless to say many people who were evacuated didn’t go back to work, they went home!  The roads are a mess, the trains are over crowded, traveling at 15 miles an hour…..and its going to be a nightmare getting home….but I totally understand their wanting to get home to family, kids, parents, their loved ones! 

There was damage to the National Cathedral, and minor damage reported around town, but no deaths to report, so I’d say we are VERY lucky here in VA/MD/DC area.  Guess I have some learning to do about earthquakes and hurricane preparations!  Did I mention, Hurricane Irene, category 3, is approaching fast, said to hit us sometime Saturday or Sunday?!?!

I have to admit, I am still a little shaky inside….and my kids are a bit freaked….but we are going to be fine, after Irenee makes her appearance!

Rita

p.s.  I still have no land line access, BUT I have text messaging on my cell:)

Have you been in an earthquake?  Where were you?  Do you know what to do during an earthquake?  Inside or outside?  What is your advice for me, the novice???  How do you explain it to a child?

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Back To School Supplies….Not Just For Your Kids!

Posted on August 15, 2011 by Rita Brennan Freay

Who loves back to school shopping?  I don’t…lol!  BUT, I do love that Staples commercial….you know the one I’m talking about where the dad is skipping down the aisles so happy…..the kids will be back in school soon!  It’s literally around the corner for me….and I know some of you have more summer ahead of you, but shopping is in your future, and as I found out, it’s NOT too early to start looking for back to school supplies!

I have to admit, private school has its ups and downs.  The best part of back to school shopping there is the uniform…a NO brainer….yay!  Did that before vacation in and out in about an hour with just one major meltdown in the dressing room…I’d say we were successful!  I don’t want to think about what it might be like to have to outfit 3 – 5 year olds….with the latest  and greatest!  Just thinking about it, and picking out clothes in the morning, gives me the chills.  To those of you doing this already, more power to you, I am not envious! 

However, I remember fondly going school shopping each year with my mom…one of my favorites were a pair of teal corduroys, and my teal pumas….oh, how I loved them!  I was all ready to go:)  My kids have their white shirts, blue pants, plaid jumpers and skirts…and they are ready too, I hope.  I think that is why they might get so excited about school supplies….the part I dread the most BUT go with it, because we need them, and if its where the joy is for them, might as well go with it (until I can’t take anymore).

Speaking of, I shopped the other day for 6th grade supplies…..because I did NOT do the pre-ordered backpack like all my friends (because I am a sucker and my daughter enjoys buying school supplies-ugh!)….and by the time I hit the 3rd store…..I was done!  All the joy was gone, and the stress was starting to seep in.  BTW, did you know they don’t make white folders (not here anyway) and we NEED one……..to whoever added that to the list, BUY me one, or we’re NOT going to have one.  Let’s not discuss the calculator…I wish I saved mine from college!

As the day progressed, and even though we were EARLY in school supply shopping so there were little crowds, I had to stop to laugh and cry.  Just watching, and seeing how much she enjoys this, and how much I am starting to “dislike” it…..especially now that its x4.  Okay, I will admit, it was fun and we got to spend some quality time together, so don’t tell her but I already pre-oredered the backpack supplies for the 2012/2013 school year…lol!  As I said on FB, now its onto shoes…..for 4……as my  daughter says, they have to be black, blue, no buckles, no laces, no pumps, no xyz……do you hear the anxiety building?!?!  THIS is when I think, WHY private school?!?!?  Let’s not get off topic!

What amazed me as we were shopping were the lists, the number of supplies needed on them, and the choices….wow!  Remember I went to 3 stores….Staples, Target and Walmart…..who had lots of the same stuff BUT different styles, colors, etc.  When I was a kid, you had a notebook (5 subject if you were lucky), pens, pencils, and that PINK rubber band thingy that held all your books together….no backpack…and certainly not on wheels!  Maybe a boyfriend who was willing to carry them…I didn’t even have that…lol!  Kids these days have NO idea how easy they’ve go it!

Which brings me to my whole point in writing this blog (I know I get distracted sometimes…so thanks for bearing with me)….FOSTER KIDS!  Yes, they want and need new school supplies too!  They would LOVE to be back to school shopping, getting new clothes, supplies, and spending the day.  So, when I saw a post on FB I thought I have to blog and ask you…..as you are shopping for school supplies this year PLEASE pick up a few extra items, or a backpack filled with pens, pencils, notebooks, erasers, highlighters, and all the fun stuff and drop it off at your local CPS office!  Imgaine the smile on a childs face….ALL kids want and need to start the year off right with new supplies….and YOU can help them do it!  It’s that simple.

So, as I am shoe shopping, I hope you will have fun with shopping for back to school supplies…..for ALL the kids

Together we can make a difference…one child at a time!

Rita

Do you enjoy school supply shopping?  What is on your list this year?  Do you recycle last years items?  Will you help out and fill a backpack for a child in need?  Do you know where your local DHS/CPS office is?

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Overload Protection…Not To Be Confused With Overdraft Protection!

Posted on August 1, 2011 by Rita Brennan Freay

These past few weeks had me on overload….doesn’t the universe know July is supposed to be an easy month?!?!  Guess not!  

Does the Universe talk to you?  Well, it talks to me.  AND if you are not listening, it keeps on talking until you get the message…like it or not.  Oh, and it can take years, if your dense, stubborn, or hard headed like me….it’s gonna get you the message, somehow, beware….lol!  I wish I had an emotional overload protector, like a surge protector, for the difficult times….I really could have used it the past few weeks!!! 

Like when, my uncle posting, Rita, you were born an angel of roughness; how you remained so stoic and level headed has always awed me. (Stoic: a person who can endure pain or hardship without showing their feelings or complaining)  had me thinking about so many things…..and questioning my actions and life experiences.  There was one person who came to mind immediately when I read it.  Somebody I know I hurt with my actions and LACK of words & emotion….even though in the end I was REALLY hurting myself too!  Crazy stuff.  The good news is that he now knows I didn’t mean it, and that I am sorry….and I was able to let it go!  Yay, I finally broke the cycle….way out of my comfort zone, but happy to be there….never going back!

There were very hard death and dying conversations with family, about wills, living wills,  urns, and then a death in the “extended” family which made it all too REAL for me.  And all at the same time there were isp technical glitches, pc crashes, the hacking of the blog server which was handled by Host Monster (thank goodness) which were all trying on the nerves…and the poor guy in the parking lot….who was totally obnoxious and really pissed me off….and lucky he didn’t get the brunt of it all….I could barely contain the NY’er within…but had to hold my tongue (to spare the 3 year old with him)! 

Seemed like the emotional overload meltdown of the century….for many reasons I will not bore you with BUT I was left thinking what the #$^%?!  Do I have a KICK ME sign on my back?  Seriously…WHAT is the universe trying to tell me??!?!  I had to pull out my Louise Hay books….and get a grip!  It all made me think about overload….and how much is too much for us to handle….at one time?!?!  Yes, I’ve heard the saying that God doesn’t give you more than you can handle.  Not sure I like it anymore….lol!  I honestly could have dealt with overdrafting my account by thousands better than I was handling this emotional “stuff”…..besides, I have overdraft protection…lol!

Of course I can laugh about it now……but at the time, I could not stay focused, get out of my own way, or log onto my computer!!  Frustrating!  A big thank YOU to my friend Julieanne Case who caught on, reached out, chatted on FB,  twitter, and called me…we talked for hours!  It really helped a lot.  Sheila Thorpe, you made me laugh & smile from another continent and time zone, you rock!  MWAH, to both of you!!!  My SNCC tribe is amazing:)

The message from the Universe you ask?  For me it’s that I need to be honest with those I love, true to myself…and let it go!  None of which is easy for me!

Today I saw a post on FB that has me thinking again…….here’s an excerpt from Jolene’s post:  ‘ask yourself am I doing this out of love or fear, as this question will answer many answers you may be seeking in your life’. 

In the past I let FEAR interFERE….not anymore!  Who wants to live in fear????

Hope you are making decisions based on love….as I did this week.  It’s a really good feeling!

Light, Love and Hugs,

Rita

Does the Universe talk to you?  What are you hearing?  Any lessons learned?  Has Fear been a factor for you?  How had it affected your actions and decisions?

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My Kindle reader…is my new best friend!

Posted on July 11, 2011 by Rita Brennan Freay

my kindle

Summer is here!  Yay!!!  My favorite times of year.  We get to slow down, relax (a little), visit with friends, go on adventures and sleep in!!!  What better way to spend the day….than at the beach or the pool with your kids…..I mean Kindle!  I really love this thing!!!  It’s funny because I thought I would still prefer my books, that I am rather attached to…but guess what, I don’t!  No, I am not parting with my Patterson or Grisham books….but there are others I can live without!  I love having it with me so I can access books anywhere, and use my time wisely.  You know how big I am on time management….lol!  Seriously, it’s come in handy in waiting rooms, car pool lines, traffic, and more.  AND did you know it has games too?!?  Very cool!  But, now my KIDS want my KINDLE…….ummm, NO!  I am not parting with mine…this is MY toy.  You have your wii, xbox, nintendo ds, ipad, and leapsters!!!  Oops, I’ve lost track of why I was writing….that’s what happens to me in July!  I am out to lunch……on vacation…reading….and loving life!

July is the only true vacation month for us.  School ending in June, and starting again in August, we treasure the month as our free month, to do nothing!  And, look forward to it every year.  We spend the other 2  months vacationing, visiting family and friends, doing school summer homework, going to camp, and running around…sometimes like crazy people!  Hectic but fun too:) 

July, however, is peaceful for my kids, calm, no commitments, no sports, no running, very lazy and carefree!  It’s about taking time to be a kid, enjoying time off, relaxing, spending the day at the pool, reading, recharging, and getting ready to start the year all over again…..next month!

Of course the weather, being in the 90′s and close to 100 degrees makes it easy to just chill….and take it easy.  I am not complaining…..life is good!  The kids are having a blast and I am right behind them with the sunscreen…making sure nobody ends up red as a lobster and in pain.  I am however wishing I was living at the beach again where it is not always so hot for some reason….and more relaxing, calming and beautiful to me.  I love the beach, the  sound of the ocean, a book in my hand, it is my all time favorite place to be….winter, spring, summer, fall….doesn’t matter.  I am home….only now it’s with my kindle in tow!

Hope you are having a wonderful summer, sleeping in, visiting family& friends, and enjoying some down time…with a few books!!!

I can’t resist a good read,

Rita

What do you do for the summer?  How do you spend your down time?  What do you do to recharge?  Are the kids able to unplug and relax?  Do you have a kindle?  Do you love it?  What are you reading?  Have any reading suggestions for me?

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Find Friends Online And Make Your Old Friends Your New Friends…or NOT!

Posted on June 27, 2011 by Rita Brennan Freay

I’ve been on Facebook for a few years…..but it was hit or miss in the beginning, learning, and not knowing what I was doing…but I tried and now that I use it for work, family, & friends…..it’s everyday.  The best part about it has been re-connecting with all of my old (new) friends.  These are people I haven’t seen or heard from in 20+ years!  So, you can imagine the tears, joy, and the laughter after re-connecting.  What a treat!  However,  not all of the old friends, who are my new friends, want to engage as much as I do…but that has to be because they don’t know me as well as they used to, right?!  Which is the whole point of “friending me” isn’t it?!?!  Well, I’m not so sure anymore…lol! 

Wow, is all I have to say….as I am really amazed and never expected that this past year would be such a total and complete roller coaster ride…with all the thrills and chills…but at least I didn’t get dizzy or sick!  Just to give you an idea……

The most unexpected, was a college friend who found me a over a year ago, we chatted on FB and shared photos, and we got to meet in NY a few months ago…that was fabulous!  After catching up on FB overtime when we met it was like there had been no time lapse from when we last saw each other…way back when!  We just picked up where we left off…it was a great and weird feeling all in one….to think I haven’t seen/talked to her in forever, and now we’re back where we started!  AWESOME!  Catherine, you always knew how to have fun & make me (and everyone else) laugh, I am so glad we found each other!  Love ya woman:)

The most emotional, was my First Love and best friend, with all the baggage that goes with it…he was next.  I was happy and conflicted at the same time.  I remember getting the friend request…it wasn’t a pretty sight (who knew?!).  I was happy, don’t get me wrong….its just that I had tears, hesitation, and feelings I didn’t expect.  Yes, of course, I accepted!  And, I am glad I did.  It has been really great re-connecting, sharing and laughing…especially at the old pictures…the kind you look at, laugh, and say omg, what were we thinking, wearing, saying, doing?!  Tommy, I will ALWAYS love you!  I am happy to have you back in my life….and look forward to getting to know you again.  I wish you health, happiness, big waves, and a phone that works…lol:)

The funniest has to be one of my girl friends from when I was around 12 years old who recently found me.  Wow, we chatted on FB, texting, then talked on the phone a few times, laughing so hard we were CRYING…almost peeing in our pants til 1:00am!  Yup, it was that good:)  My brother always tells the story of how we (living across the street from one another) were inseparable and would constantly be on the phone even though we had just left each other 5 minutes prior…to find out what color shirt the other would be wearing that night.  He might be right, but who cares, as I said to her, it was part of being a teenager, and bonding, AND the great thing is we both remember it like it was yesterday = good memories!  Love ya BaBa, the reunion is going to be great…I will call you in 5 minutes…hehehe!  And remember, “she” will NEVER be one of us…rofl!

And then came the shocker…someone friended me and I about fell out of my chair….and I answered with a OMFG….because I was truly shocked!  Seriously.  That’s another whole story…but you get the picture.  We laughed about finding your old  friends who become your new friends….and it’s so true!  One of the things she said that resonated and prompted me to write this is, we all need our tribe!  Having had this conversation time and time again with many others I know it’s SO right!  And, it doesn’t matter if its a new tribe (my SNCC tribe), an old tribe (96th St), or a mixture of both!  We need each other….in good times and bad.  AND, let’s face it, there is some comfort in talking with people who grew up down the block, down the hall, know the milestones and landmarks, and the family, because they have known you since you were 12…..especially when you are no longer “at home”.  Jenn, you are so funny…yes, we missed & loved you and all wondered where the HELL you were!?!?  Glad you found us…and are growing your tribe!

For me, moving away from everyone and everything I know…took its toll.  Not easy, and when you have kids, it stinks even more!  But, somehow you suck it up and deal…not my mothers words, but the hidden meaning in them!  Luckily, I faired well, and have always had an easy time at making & keeping “friends” and have kept in touch with ”my circle” as my friend Maridel Bowes calls it which has made life sweeter….but I still felt it….and still have my moments!

My hope for you is that you are finding friends online, making your old friends your new friends, and meeting even more to grow your circle and your tribe!  It can be quite an experience IF you are willing to engage and participate in your “friends” fb lives.  I can tell you first hand it has rocked my world…in a very good way!  I LOVE my tribe!!!

Enjoy the ride….and the journey….life is short!

Rita

Are you on Facebook?  How long?  What do you use it for?  Best/worst parts?  Have you found your “old” friends?  Do you plan to?  Making new friends?  Where/How?  What is stopping you?  Any suggestions for those new to FB?

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